Hello, My Name is Inigo Montoya

Ah, the Princess Bride, what a great movie. Boy #1 has seen it, but I don't think the other two have. It doesn't matter, though, all three of them channel the spirit of Inigo Montoya.

I'm talking about the way that Inigo goes after the 6-fingered man with a single-minded tenacity. There are times when my kids do the same thing - of course not with such noble tendencies. It's as if they have been endowed with a mission from their dead father to avenge him by, for example, demanding a hot dog. Let me show you today's example.

This morning I was in the bathroom, getting dressed and ready for the day. The door was locked, because I'm not stupid, and Boy #3 walks up and knocks on the door.

Boy #3: Mom!
Me: What?
Boy #3: Mom!
Me: What?
Boy #3: Mom!
Me: What!!?
Boy #3: Mom!
Me: WHAT?
Boy #3: (doesn't say anything)
I think I'm safe, but it doesn't last.
Boy #3: Come here, Mom!
Me: Hold on a minute.
Boy #3: Mom, Come here!
Me: Hold on a minute!
Boy #3: Come here, Mom!
Me: HOLD ON A MINUTE!
Boy #3: (doesn't say anything)
I hear him walking away in my room, then I hear him banging stuff around. Shortly, there's a knock again.
Boy #3: Mom!
Me: Hold on.
Boy #3: Mom! Come here!
Me: Hold on!
Boy #3: Come here!
Me: HOLD ON!

The scene repeats itself tonight at bedtime, when he wants to eat a hot dog. Unfortunately, there are no hot dogs in the house.

Boy #3: I want a hot dog.
Me: There aren't any hot dogs. Do you want a peanut butter sandwich instead?
Boy #3: I want a hot dog!
Me: They're all gone. Can I get you something else?
Boy #3: I want a hot dog!
Me: Honey, there aren't any hot dogs! No hot dogs! Get it?
Boy #3: I want a hot dog!
Me: How about a cup of juice?
Boy #3: Hot Dog!
Me: Milk?
Boy #3: Hot Dog!
Me: What do you think, I can magically conjure a hot dog out of thin air? There are no hot dogs in the whole entire house, and no matter how many times you ask there will still be no hot dogs! I am not a hot dog factory, I cannot produce for you a hot dog! Do you understand? No hot dogs!
Boy #3: I want a hot dog!

I know how the six-fingered man felt when Inigo kept saying "Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die." I would have been thinking "Go ahead - death would be better than this!"